The man questions whether he was mistaken in cutting off his stepmother after she plotted to steer his fiancée toward her own son.
NEED TO KNOW
- A man claims his stepmother attempted to sabotage his engagement so her son could pursue his fiancée.
- When he eventually proposed in secret, her surprising response left him speechless.
- Now his father has left, and the family may never be the same again.
A man asks for guidance from theRedditcommunity after cutting his stepmother out of his life and possibly causing his father to leave her. He explains that the reason is because his stepmother has been attempting to undermine his engagement to make her own son happy.
A 24-year-old states, “My stepmother is attempting to interfere with my engagement to make her son happy.” He mentions that he has been in a relationship with his girlfriend, Cara, for several years, having first met her at an anime convention in New York City.
The poster recalls that they had met years prior when both were employed by an ambulance company, although Cara initially didn’t recognize him. “We hit it off and have been close friends ever since; then during the pandemic I asked her out on a date, and we’ve been together ever since,” he says.
He refers to Cara as “amazing,” noting her fondness for anime, fantasy books, science fiction, and other typical hobbies. Although she is also enthusiastic about true crime podcasts, which he doesn’t particularly enjoy, he adds, “it makes her happy.”
After they started seeing each other, he brought Cara to meet his father, stepmother Karen, and stepbrother Tom. “Everything went really well, and Cara really connected with my family,” he remembers, although he observed that his stepbrother had an unusually intense interest in her.
“Tom was starting to get a bit annoying by visiting my apartment more often and texting Cara a lot,” he writes. Cara mentioned it to him, but the couple chose not to worry about it initially.
The situation worsened when Tom moved into their house. “My stepmother asked if Tom could live with us… we have an extra bedroom in the rental home, which was originally a guest room,” he explains, noting that he and Cara agreed provided it was just for a short period.
Soon after Tom moved in, the boundaries vanished. “He wants to spend every day with us,” the post states, noting that Tom would join them during video games, interrupt Cara’s personal time, and even tag along on date nights.
The couple attempted to resist, but Tom’s mother consistently took his side. “He would cry to his mom, and she would claim we weren’t being kind to Tom,” the poster remembers, adding that his stepmother maintained her son felt isolated.
A critical moment occurred when Tom joined a vacation. “Cara and I had booked a trip, and he just happened to choose the same cruise as us; that was a major warning sign,” he says, adding that the cruise focused on Cara’s interest in true crime.
Following that terrible trip, he informed Tom that it was time to leave. “Fortunately, my dad stepped in and told Karen that it’s been 14 months and he needs to find his own place,” he writes, feeling relieved that Tom went back to live with his parents.
Even though Tom continued to try and insert himself into their lives, the couple found some calm again. That is, until the poster asked his father for his late mother’s wedding ring to propose to Cara.
My father happily gave me the ring without asking any questions, and also gave me his wedding ring for myself,” he says. However, when Karen found out, she openly criticized it, stating that Cara was “an older woman and that is appropriate.
Tom also had a negative reaction. “He said I don’t know Cara the way he does,” the poster remembers. Tom even took it further by predicting the couple “will be divorced within a year of getting married.”
Although there was a lot of negativity, he set up several opportunities to ask for her hand in marriage. However, every effort was disrupted by sudden problems with Karen, including hospital visits, flat tires, and a broken grill.
Frustrated, he chose to take Cara on a journey to Japan and secretly propose. “I didn’t tell anyone, I had everything arranged and booked a spa day in Japan and asked her! She said yes,” he writes.
The joyful news was not known to all. “[Karen] flooded my phone with messages about how could I do this to Tom!!!” he recalls about his stepmother, who informed him, “Tom is in love with Cara and she is his only.”
Karen went so far as to plead with him to surrender Cara. “She was constantly calling and texting, asking if I could just let Tom have Cara,” he remembers, shocked. His response was firm: “Cara is a person and she’s not something to be handed over, and she doesn’t belong to anyone.”
He claims he presented his father with the voicemails and messages, which led his dad to leave Karen and move in with him. “My Dad wasn’t surprised, but he’s staying at my house because he doesn’t know what to do,” he explains.
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But Karen and Tom haven’t ceased their actions. “They continue to pass by the house and attempt to contact my dad,” he states. The couple has blocked both of them, although he acknowledges, “I might obtain a restraining order because this is causing Cara a lot of discomfort.”
A commenter comforts him, “You aren’t accountable for the behavior of a grown man and his overly dramatic mother.” The poster replies, “I’m just trying to protect Cara from all this.”
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